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Film Review: The Flash (2023)

STORY

Bruce Wayne warns Barry Allen of severe consequences if he keeps traveling back in time to see his mother alive. Overcome by his emotions, Barry uses speed force to alter the past and ends up in another universe where there is another version of Barry with his mother alive.


INTRODUCTION

Welcome to yet another sad chapter of an ever-collapsing brain-farting universe of DCEU or DCU. A cinematic universe whose Gods are still devising a plan to jump-start and level with Disney Studio‘s Marvel Cinematic Universe.

After seven years of inception, or maybe ten if I do not dare to miss Man of Steel, the story of this cinematic universe still fails to get the confidence vote of comic book audience and DC Comics loyalists. Meetings after meetings, reshoots after reshoots, executive producers are still clueless and now almost every Justice League actor is out besides Jason Momoa. If you ever get to know that a DC film has been interrupted with the bosses ordering reshoots, realize that the film is already marching towards the failure before even hitting the theatres.


REVIEW

The Flash is just another DC superhero film that is badly trying to follow one of the successful routes of MCU philosophy which is dragging humor in almost everything. Yes, The Flash is a cool dude and I cannot imagine his solo film going dark despite his dark origins and many portions of comic book pages turning black in the past.

The Flash film is supposed to entertain the audience. But you have to apply the fun and the entertainment only when the cinematic universe is either fixed or turning towards a game-changer. Fixing the universe and being a game changer are the two major factors this film was to be made responsible for. Instead, the film overcooked the whole screenplay with a very unconvincing plot. After such a messed up plot and extremely bad CGI, you will have to ask yourself, what was the value of the entire story of the film? Exactly, close to none.

Warner Bros. bosses have still not learned their lesson from DCEU failures. You cannot drag so many characters in a single film to get the audience approval. The story of the film needs breathing. And there is no space or time of maturing the supporting characters who are introduced.

Michael Keaton‘s Batman has returned and roped into this miserable DC universe just like wrestling legends are often dragged to WWE events to attract the audience. After mere ten minutes of onscreen appearance, Keaton’s Batman agrees to fight alongside visibly two boys with silly jokes to find Superman and stop General Zod from invading the planet. Ten Minutes! Keaton’s Batman who looked so washed up to his old game suddenly finds reason to return and fight. Such development requires build up and that lacked here.

There is nothing Wow! about Supergirl at all. Boring introduction, unattractive fighting sequences, and no character development. Plus, Sasha Calle doesn’t look fit for the role. Michael Shannon‘s General Zod is terribly wasted. You must have felt Zod’s wrath in Man of Steel ten years ago. Why? Because Zod’s character was widely stretched to fit in the story and make you feel uncomfortable about his madness. But this time, I was not getting that thrill to see him attempting to invade the planet. Zod was in the film for hardly 15 minutes.

Unprecedented cameos in the final act were meaningless and once again, dragged. Yes, thank you. Super thank you for finally uniting Christopher Reeve‘s Superman and Helen Slater‘s Supergirl in the same frame in such a blood-boiling use of CGI. But at what cost? In fact, I am curious to know the real cost of production for “The Flash”. Wikipedia and various sources on the internet says that this film costs over $200 million in the production. I fail to believe a film with such heaving budget hitting the theatres with that deepfake and horrible CGI.

The dialogues of the film lacks substance. There is no impact but very off dialogues.”Come on Barbie, Let’s go party?” “You wanna get nuts? Let’s get nuts.” The Music score is super ordinary. So many vital scenes lack a musical impact. Zero inspiration.

I am unsure of Ezra Miller‘s future after being surrounded with so many controversies but after watching “The Flash”, I feel it is time to find a new face. This character portrayal is way too cheesy. And it feels like the television portrayal by Grant Gustin was more fitting and closer to comic books in comparison.

Some interesting developments come out from this film. Like Barry was in Metropolis when Zod starting killing people. Ben Affleck‘s Batman riding Batpod similar to what Christian Bale and Anne Hathaway drove in “The Dark Knight Trilogy“. Our Boba Fett shows up as Tom Curry of the other world to whom Barry calls to check if he is Arthur Curry‘s father. Keaton’s Batman electrocuting Flash is a straight comic reference from “Flashpoint“.

When ‘The Flash’ was announced years ago, my first impression was that this film will be based on “Flashpoint” due to the nature of the continuity in the first phase of DCEU indicating about it when Barry comes from the future to warn Bruce in Batman v Superman. But I guess I was in delusion to assume if WB executives will come up with a plan smart enough to run a comic book inspired storyline.


PLUSES

Despite being immensely disappointed with the film, I liked a couple of scenes. One was Ben Affleck’s Bruce Wayne’s thought-provoking advises to Barry. The life lesson Bruce gave here to Barry were quite hard hitting that actually makes Ben Affleck’s version of Bruce more subtle. I wish DCEU had valued this angle of Bruce/Batman. The other scene was Barry meeting his mother one last time in the supermarket. Knowing the fact that he is reversing the altered timeline which means his mother will remain killed in the past breaks Barry and makes the audience re-imagine what if the sons and daughters meet their dead parents while traveling back in time one last time? How does it feel? Painful, isn’t it? This is what Bruce was trying to understand Barry, “These scars we have make us who we are. We’re not meant to go back and fix them. And there’s nothing broken with you that needs to be fixed.”


TWO BATMEN IN THE SAME FILM!!!

A cinematic delight to our eyes was appearance of not one but two Batmen in the same film. Let’s not talk about the third Bruce Wayne of the film which was also meaningless. But anyway, a story that had to make two Batmen from different worlds appear for Barry didn’t give much chills to the audience. One may ask themselves, should two Batmen have shared the same screen? Just like three Spidermen? I think it obviously would have been exciting. But at what cost? The given story didn’t support to bring them together. So I think it was a good decision. Maybe it would have been more heartbreaking to see two Batmen together being part of an unusual disappointment.


THE DCEU MESS UP

So what now? Now, I wait for Aquaman and observe how James Gunn‘s vision for a fresh DC universe will give birth from there. Am I excited? About what? This DCEU had a weak foundation due to a punctured storyline that was unjust to the Justice League. The slating of the films, the interferences of Warner Bros. bosses, the reshoots of the films, the Joss Whedon chapter, and last of all rejecting Zack Snyder‘s version of continuing of what possibly looked like a very promising trilogy of the JL. All this failed to present a DCEU that we comic geeks ever wanted to watch out.

Just take a small example of planning Michael Keaton to play a Nick Fury kind of role in the future films of the DCEU. And for that purpose, Keaton starred in this film. And then, he worked in Batgirl and then the upcoming sequel of Aquaman. When WB hired James Gunn, he came up with a new plan that held no future for Keaton. Therefore, he was killed in ‘The Flash’. Batgirl got shelved in the post production. And his scenes from Aquaman cut. How do you expect actors to work with you in this universe for a long period?


ANOTHER BOX-OFFICE DISASTER!

When it comes to the box-office collections, The Flash, believe it or not, is the sixth consecutive flop in the DCEU. Shazam in 2019 was the last DCEU film that met success. Since then, two of the DCEU films didn’t even reach the cost of the film budget, Wonder Woman 1984, and The Suicide Squad. Perhaps because of COVID-hit 2020. But still, the last three DCEU films didn’t even meet the break even point. And now Blue Beetle has become the seventh consecutive flop in the DCEU.


GUNN’S VISION

Shall I be optimist about James Gunn’s vision for future DCU? See I am inclined towards Zack Snyder’s vision but it is useless to whine about something that is shelved. The one aspect I really like about Gunn is that he is a comic geek and knows this shit. The developments of the future projects that he announced all have essence of comic books which is exactly what a comic geek desperately wants; a universe that identifies and recognizes the efforts and contributions of the writers. Where and what is the enthusiasm if a superhero film doesn’t have a comic book value at all? To devalue book sources and detach a comic character and story line for a new once-upon-a-time, you need to come up with an extremely rich writing content that can hit the audience while playing the right chords. So not every film can be Joker at all.


CLOSING REMARKS

To end my never-ending assessment, take ‘The Flash’ as a comedy film and a forgettable past, and for some time, we believe in the theory that S stands for Hope.

RATINGS: 3/10


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TWITTER

How Bad Was WWE Crown Jewel?

Although I don’t write the blogs on the World Wrestling Entertainment because I don’t follow that much. I am more focused on watching pay-per-view (PPV) events. I am not able to watch Raw and Smackdown episodes because of the sharp difference of timings between the US and Saudi Arabia. After what I watched the PPV event called WWE Crown Jewel, I am thinking about writing a blog on this terrible episode of nuisance and figuring out the points due to the fact I find this show the worst PPV I have ever watched.

1. BAD POLITICAL INFLUENCE

The globally infamous killing of a Saudi journalist ignited the worldwide audience to push towards the cancellation and not to step a foot in the name of the entertainment until the political crisis between the countries over the subject is clear. There was a strong rumor of the postponement which meant the continuity of the stories running in the weekly episodes of Raw and SmackDown may have to alter in haste and their 10-year deal with General Sports Authority (GSA) was in jeopardy. But somehow this show went on and most of the global fan following couldn’t believe that the event was still on the cards. Result? The PPV event went controversial all over.

2. VENUE & CROWD

People living in the capital will agree to the fact that the ideal venue for such a massive event should have been their ‘Pearl of Stadiums’, King Fahd International Stadium holding the rich capacity of over 68,000 spectators. The sudden change in plans within a month downsized the highly expected lively environment when the show moved to King Saud University Stadium which has approximately 25,000 seats to offer.

Due to the drastic change in the numbers, the electrifying environment was numbed. Many stage entrances had no deserving roar. People in the VIP seats were the most boring and disappointing faces who sat idle and showed no enthusiasm for the event. Many times, the VIPs didn’t bother to stand on their feet and notice who was thrown to the floor from the ring. As much animating and exhilarating was the crowd in Jeddah when the Greatest Royal Rumble was staged in front of over 60,000 spectators, the outcome in the Riyadh show was on the contrary.

3. JOHN CENA & DANIEL BRYAN OUT

Both, John Cena and Daniel Bryan, are currently the biggest faces of the WWE. People love and adore them. Their refusals to the event meant that Cena-Bryan followers in the KSA had to down their plans and take the whole scenario to the other theoretical dimensions. Cena and Bryan were officially removed from the event and were replaced by Bobby Lashley and Samoa Joe respectively. Cena’s refusal was more of a worrying sign as he widely praised and considered an honor and privilege to compete in the KSA during the Greatest Royal Rumble.

4. WORLD CUP?

The concept of the World Cup is not highly marketed or recognized in the North American region due to the immense popularity of their big 4 i.e., NBA, NFL, MLB, and NHL. So when this concept dropped on the cards, it sounded bizarre. A ‘WORLD’ Cup between eight men? Not buying at all. The writers could have forwarded many better proposals than this. With the weight of the name, the writers could have focused only on the tournament in this PPV event and added numerous wrestlers in an expanded knockout phase instead of starting from the quarterfinals.

5. SHANE MCMAHON – THE BEST IN THE WORLD?

And guess what, the stupidity didn’t end with bringing the idea of a World Cup, the stupidity earned its vulnerable reputation when the tournament ended with the SmackDown commissioner Shane McMahon winning the trophy. The man who didn’t even compete in the whole tournament decided to replace The ‘injured’ Miz during the final against Dolph Ziggler. This was like ruining a party. Even if The Miz had won by cheating, may have some average responses from the viewers but seeing Shane taking the trophy was the mockery to the competition they were referring for so many weeks. McMahon Jr. celebrated throughout the arena with the trophy and the crowd responded with low esteem.

How dumb can be the writing of a WWE episode? This reminded me Braun Strowman, after all the suspense, picking a 10-year-old kid his partner in this year’s WrestleMania. Or Vince Russo destroying WCW.

6. LESNAR AGAIN?

Brock Lesnar‘s extreme irregularity in WWE has caused wide criticism in a past few years and has raised many eyebrows over the hype of his sustaining the Universal Championship belt for that long. The complaint is just and in the storyline, viewers did get rid of him when Roman Reigns defeated him in this year’s SummerSlam. A triple threat match was scheduled in Crown Jewel between Braun Strowman, Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns but then Reigns himself announced a legitimate diagnosis of leukemia. Therefore, he had to relinquish the belt within two weeks to start Crown Jewel.

Another sad news? Actually no because the audience was done with The Big Dog with lack of interest in showing up in most of the PPV as a part of the main event. His rivalry with an irregular Lesnar was booed.  So it became a singles match for the Universal Championship title. With Lesnar’s reign stretched to 504 record days, there was no need to win Brock another title.

The beast who offers nothing but suplexes and F5s used a similar method on Braun Strowman and won the match within 5 minutes. And once again, Lesnar and Strowman didn’t get a better contest. Making Lesnar repeatedly win shows that the showrunner and the writer are not listening to the criticism. They are adamant to make the same mistakes again and again.

7. SHAWN MICHAELS’ COMEBACK

For all these eight years, HBK maintained his words to not come out of retirement after losing to The Undertaker in the Wrestle Mania. It was, in my opinion, a sorry departure after losing the Streak v Career match. And it was a fitting farewell. HBK showed up many times in the ring afterward. Even gave sweet chin music a few times but didn’t return until the unnecessary drama at the MCG ignited for a showdown between the two extremely beloved tag teams of the Attitude era, The Brothers of Destruction and DX.

The MCG match between The Undertaker and HHH was supposed to be the final encounter between them but the writers had something else in their minds to annoy the fans. The legacy which ended with HHH beating The Undertaker at the MCG didn’t need to expand the script to shape it like a soap opera.

The timing of HBK’s return was extremely bad. The writers could have preferred to make HBK’s return in the next year’s WrestleMania for a revenge match and possibly end their careers on a high. Seeing HBK was a nostalgia as WWE’s business is nowadays relying on nostalgic matches and appearances.

HBK’s iconic sexy-boy image has aged, the guy is 53 now. Further disturbing was watching a bald Shawn Michaels who always sported long hair. He cut his pony and then shaved his head this year. Being a huge fan of HBK, I am not convinced of his return.


I am not convinced with the stories that are extended in the continuities. The creativity in the writing has met a severe low. I hope this does not repeat again. WWE Crown Jewel was a massive disappointment. The only thing which was impressive about the event was fireworks. PPV event will possibly return next year back in Jeddah on April. Hope to be better than this.

Dazed and Confused

GLOBAL MUSLIMS

“Saudi Arabia! Learn from UAE. See how they improve their living standard, enhance opportunities, provide social entertainment, invest money in public interests and recreation activities. When will you join the other countries this millennium? You don’t even let women drive on the roads. How backward you are? Grow up!”

SAUDI ARABIA

“Alright alright! We will allow women to drive but will allow them to drive by next year because we have to establish driving facilities for the women and train them first. Also, we will try our best to adopt general measures to avoid traffic accidents. We will further allow women to work in the shops and offices, even on stalls, fairs and as cashier too.
Let’s add some entertainment for your amusement. We will decide to bring WWE wrestlers including John Cena and Big Show for your best luxury because most of you are fond of wrestling. But our sincere apologies, we will not add wrestling divas, we cannot go that far. I hope you understand.


In addition, considering your enthusiasm in comics, we will plan to stage a globally recognized international convention like Comic-Con. No no no you can wear costumes and fashion accessories in love of your favorite characters. Yes, you can become cosplayers. And don’t worry, we will invite well-known celebrities who will mesmerize you all. You will have the moment to meet and greet them, shake hand and even take a selfie with them. 
This is just a beginning, and we do realize how music has been a significant part of our culture. So we will treat our locals to listen and watch the performance of their favorite, Mohammad Abdu, to your cities. We will experiment some other musical interest in the future. How about Jazz music? We can organize that for you in an industrial city. And how about inviting the world-famous musicians? We can start from Yanni and bring the musical phenomena of team Yanni near to your cities. Why not? We can bring him and his team.


Indeed all you people are fond of watching the Western and Arab films but do you know that our Saudi people are not behind of cinematic talent. There are many talented filmmakers and actors. We shall consider organizing film festivals and bring theatres close to you.

We never focused on attracting tourists to enrich our history and culture before. Like other countries, we are not behind in attracting the tourists and we will earn the global reputation. We do realize there are numerous sites which can attract millions of visitors. Let’s work on few of these. We will invest heavy money in such places. If things work as per the plan we will begin issuing tourist visas too. Just wait and see.”

GLOBAL MUSLIMS

“Astaghfirullah bro! How can you allow women to drive the car? This will bring fitna and raise the opportunity for gender mixing. The woman will have every chance to drive by herself all alone which will lead the men’s society to stare her and raise concerns about the reasons for her driving.

She will be at ease to hang out with other girls (or maybe boys) and walk on the streets like stray dogs.

Students at Effat Women’s University, Jeddah, Saudi Arabia, 2009; photograph by Olivia Arthur from her 2012 book, Jeddah Diary

No need to let them step out of home for huh work? Why does she want to work when her brother, father, and husband is earning? What could be the reason for going out for ‘work’? And what kind of ‘work’ does she want to do? They should stay at home, learn to cook food, produce offsprings, teach their children and obey every word what her husband or parent wishes or commands.
How can you consider inviting kuffar and their inventions to the holy country? Wrestling discourages peace and encourages viewers to fight. So what if you didn’t invite wrestling divas due to the obvious reasons as hellfire is already approved on them, the male wrestlers also promote nudity and shamelessness.


Comic books lead the readers towards mental illness and make them think and develop a theory that superheroes actually exist. By believing the fictional heroes, they will stop believing in our beloved messengers, their message and the true warriors of Islam. Do you know there are nauzubillah (I seek refuge in Allah) so many Gods in comics? How can you let them wear improper dresses and make them shake hands of the famous kuffar people? May Allah guide you.


Music? The voice of Shaitan? The world is near to end. Oh, Muslim Ummah! Do you know you are fulfilling the needs of Western countries? Do you know you are inviting evil by encouraging people to listen to their music? Seems like you have lost your credibility as a Muslim country.


You should realize that they are enemies of Islam and by investing your money in advertising their culture and fashion, we will be manipulated and one day they will occupy our holy land. They will marry our Muslim women and produce offsprings who will tweet/retweet their false religion. Auzubillah Auzubillah. May Allah have mercy and guide you to the right path. Amen.”

 

SAUDI ARABIA

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